The reason I wanted to write a blog is because I think it is very therapeutic and I think that what lies ahead for us is so unknown (both exciting and scary) that this is something that can help me. Since the babies were born at 27 weeks we have a lot of uphill battles ahead of us, most unknown at this time. We see a developmental clinic, neurologist, pediatrician, and eye doctor. At this point early intervention has not be recommended by anyone, but we expect it will be at some point. We are very hopeful that both Jack & Ellie will be healthy and we are going to make sure they have all the help they need to get there.
I am hoping that many of the same people who followed us on caringbridge are also going to follow along on here. The babies continue to grow everyday and never cease to amaze Mike and I at how truly amazing they really are.
When the babies were in the NICU I never thought that the day would come when they would come home. Mike and I talked about it every single day and every day it seemed like that day would never come. We got frustrated with the NICU staff and with the babies and each other the closer it came to them coming home. We thought if we just got them home they would eat, or act more appropriate, or whatever the issue was that day. Little did we know that when we got them home our lives would be turned completely upside down and neither one of us had any clue what we were in for.
People always say you never know what it is like to have a new baby until you have one - and boy are they right. I swear I thought that having the babies home would be so manageable--I would put them into my little routine and we all would be so happy. I told my book club I would not miss a meeting and could easily read all the books - I just thought well the baby will sleep and I will read- of course! And I told my pilates instructor I would be right back after I delivered and would jump right back into the swing of things - even thought running Broad street in May would be a great way to get back in shape. Boy oh boy was I naive....I swear I thought that I could get it all done! What I didn't account for was that I had 2 babies- who were on 2 different schedules! And that babies don't sleep for long periods of time and when they do I need to sleep or shower, no time for leisure activities. Luckily Mike and I both have great families and we used our parents almost every single day. I needed too!
We are finally in a place now where the babies are sleeping. I am such an organized, planned person - so having 2 babies on their own schedules was extremely hard for me. Adjusting to this new life took its toll on me. It has been almost 5 months since they have been home and I swear every single day gets better. I talk to my sister now who has an infant and she says how much she is loving him right now and how all she wants to do is snuggle - I get emotional thinking about that because I never got to experience that. It's hard even to write that.
I am sitting here writing this and re-reading it and re-organizing it and it is just bringing back so many memories and emotions. It really has been such a journey for us these past 8 months and we truly are so blessed to have 2 "miracle babies" and family and friends that are so supportive. We never can thank all of you enough for everything you did/do. I am sure I missed some thank yous here and there, but we have been overcome by all of the generosity! So thank you! Thank you for the food, clothes, cards, prayers, emails, letters, flowers, and everything else!
I intend to update this blog at least once a month with what is going on with the twins and hopefully posting LOTS of pictures - which i am not great at. I love reading your comments so please post them! And I am really looking forward to writing each month about my family!
